R.I.P Opa..
Today has been long.. Can't believe my granddad died last night.. i know we should all have been prepared, as the doctors have been telling us for months now that he will die. But when my mum called me last night i was so chocked didn't know what to do.. So i did what i do best, took a valium and a sleeping pill and went to bed, after a long night's sleep it is easier to live with stuff..
It's weird to know i will never have coffee with him again, or go to our favorite greek restaurant or have ice cream at the italian place in the neighbourhood.. Never go to museums again.. He was always so proud of our german roots and trying to show us that it aint a bad thing to be german.. Never again will we go to café reichards again for our favorite cakes and coffee..
It will be weird to go home to germany and not be able to see him, not be able to go for a walk with grandmas dog to see him, and try to convince him that feeding a heavily overweight dog aint the way to go..
I will miss all his long stories about people i never met, stories that he could describe in such detail like no one else ever could..
I will miss how he used to always joke around with everyone and flirt with all waitresses..
I will miss how even though he had such strickt views and ideas about everything, always made an exception for me. How he always got me coke even though he hated how americanized society was, and boycotted american products.. He always had coke at his for me.. And he used to always go to the kiosk next door to get me liquorice when i came.
Or how he even though being so strickt with other people, gave me a key to his house so i could sleep there after a night out partying so i wouldn't have to walk all the way from the tube to my grandmas..
It is weird, i have never had anyone i ever been close to, or loved die before.. I guess the only thing you can do is put up and pretend like nothing happened until this feeling goes away..
I wish i could be with my family now more than ever before, wish i could be there for my mum, can't even imagine how hard this must be on her..
Wish i could be there for my brother, who found out that Opa died on the same day as his sons first birthday.
Something that should have been such a happy day for the whole family.. But at least now there is no more pain and suffering for you.
Rest in peace Opa, you will be greatly missed by many but especially your family.
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